Musical Beds… how did I get here?

By Dan Laxer

They're both finally asleep. One, mouth open, a daddy-sized snore emanating from a booger-blocked nose. The other in her favourite nightie, hands tucked under her little head, one little naked butt cheek peeking out at me. Just hours ago they were spinning, Tasmanian Devil-like, destroying everything in their path; you'd think we had termites. Nope. We have kids. They'll sleep peacefully until something wakes them up and they both make their way, at different times of night, into our bed. My son stands noiselessly beside the bed, looking down at me, just as I did to my mother when I was his age. I wake with a start, sigh with exhaustion and as much exasperation as my still sleeping brain can muster. Then I'll throw back the covers and move over to make room for him… or at least as much room as possible, given that my little girl had magically appeared earlier between my wife and me. She's splayed, like a tossed-away bag pipe, or a beached octopus swept ashore by a tsunami. I've got a bit of bed and almost no covers to my name. But I make a little room for her older brother. There we all are, Mommy, Daddy, big brother, and little sister in what had at one time been a bed big enough to contain the world. Now there's just enough room for all of us, though none of us can really move, yet it contains the world still. I drift off, praying for morning and the saving grace of the alarm clock. Some nights my son shows up after my daughter's claimed most of the space for herself. There's no room for him, let alone mommy and daddy, so we squeeze into his little twin bed. I can barely manage the foetal position, but my toes would otherwise hang off the end. Though I am uncomfortable, he is comforted. It will not be a restful night, but it's okay with me. This won't last forever. And I know I'll want it back when it's gone. I kiss him on the head. "Goodnight, boychick," I say. "I love you. Now, go to sleep." I put my head down and close my eyes. "And no farting.”

DAN LAXER, Dad to Jakob, 8 and Sophie, 5, Radio host of CJAD's Laxer Live, Mon-Fri 2:00 - 4:00, co-host of the CJAD Trivia Show, Sundays 9:00-noon This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.